The Fight for Faith

At times in my Christian life -especially in the darker times- I have doubted things that God has said. I used to be pretty ashamed at this (it is indeed shameful) and thought that somehow this was not normal. What is a Christian anyway, but someone who believes in Jesus? So then how can one really be a Christian if he doubts that God exists? (Or whatever it is that you may doubt)

This is a serious matter, one that I am certainly not alone in. But this post is not primarily about the dark times in our Christians lives, but how to understand and grow in them. So for encouragement, I will first mention a correlation that was pointed out to me by one of my friends, namely that my doubts came the most when I was not in the Word, spending time with God. This would seem to make sense, the further you are from something (or someone) relationally, the more questions and uncertainties there will be. But with the one you are completely open and honest with, the one you spend time with every day, there will be a trust. That's an important consideration.

Later God revealed to me the second fact. I don't remember quite how or when, but the second truth, that belief is the main fight of the Christian life, was somewhat revolutionary. Maybe it was from Future Grace by John Piper. or the doctrine of sanctification or some other thing. Most likely I learned it from the father who says to Jesus, "I believe, help my unbelief!" in Mark 9:24. But however it was learned, the realization came to me like the sunrise of a new day: Our doubt is not an unusual thing to be spurned and hidden. Our doubt is to be brought out in the open and attacked like the last enemy we have. But before I get ahead of myself, let me highlight the importance of this thought.

This changed everything for me. It changed the nature of the Christian life. I'm no longer fighting abstract concepts of pride, lust, self consciousness and whatever other sin issue may exist in my life. I do fight them. But I contend with them in one battle: The fight for faith.

How does this work? It works like this: Am I reading my Bible enough? No. Well if I really believed that the Bible contained the answers for my life, would not I read it every day? Am I thinking of myself more highly than I ought? Yes. Well, if I really believed that I was a great sinner justified by a holy God entirely apart from any work of my own, who is completely dependent on Him for life, breath and every small thing in my life, would I really be prideful?

The Christian life is the fight for believing. And we don't believe. Like the father said to Jesus, we do, but we don't. Not perfectly, at least, because if we believed perfectly, we would live perfectly. This is the main issue. This is where we stand or fall. The crux of the life of any believer is his or her belief.

But how do we fight for it? To me this is the most amazing thing. How do we fight for faith? The answer is you can't. Either you believe it or you don't, and you don't. This would seem like a hopeless situation. But let's turn once more to the father of the demon-possessed boy. What did he do for his unbelief?

First he openly acknowledged his unbelief. This is important. The worst thing a Christian or anyone can do with their unbelief is hide it. The Deceiver does his best work with secret things. Don't let it be something you quietly keep to yourself and worry about. The best thing to do with your unbelief is bring it in the open so that it will melt in the light of the encouragement of a Christian brother or sister.

Second, he took his unbelief to Jesus. This is important. Tell God that you don't believe. If you doubt, let God know about it in prayer. He longs to hear from you and strengthen you. He's not going to be like, "What?! You don't believe?! Haven't I sent you enough proof yet?" The Father knows the Christian life is more about a relationship then about proofs, he made it that way. So have a conversation with God, and be honest about the areas where you struggle, and ask for his help and guidance. Remember Lk 11:13 in your prayer. God longs to send to you His Spirit and the grace that comes with that. He won't withhold it if you ask. So ask.

Third, he believed. This is where you stand on what you know to be true in the Word of God and wait for your feelings to catch up. Of course you can't stand on what you don't know. So reading the Word of God and spending time with him is imperative. If you are praying to God, talking with other Christians and actively exposing yourself to the promises of God's Word, you'll find that God will do what you couldn't. He will cause you to believe.


Remember that this isn't a one time thing. This is an everyday, multiple-times-throughout-the-day-til-the-day-you-die thing. So keep at it. And you will find that as you start to grow in a relationship with God things in your walk, though still difficult, will start to fall into place, being centered on the main thing: Believing God.